Forgiveness - The Pink Recycle Bin

Dear Unconditional Love — What would you have me know today about forgiveness?

I’m here. Wow this is a hard one. I wonder why you’re so interested in forgiveness right now. I’m worried you might be wanting to forgive the people on your “list” for the wrong reasons. To feel better about yourself. To feel like the story you have about your own good person-ness is somehow true if other people understand you to be a “good” person too.

That’s not what forgiveness is about. Forgiveness is about w

Forgiveness is not about you. It’s about the other person. You can be mad and hold on. You can be resentful and hold on. Forgiving feels to you like it IS letting someone else off the hook. But you don’t believe in that. You want other people to know what they did and how it hurt you, so you feel afraid of forgiveness because it leaves you unseen, yet again. Does it help when I tell you forgiveness is not about you? Forgiveness is about forgiving someONE. I know that’s how you see it babe. What other word would feel more right to you? Seeing feels right. If you could see that person for all that they are from the beginning of when they chose their soul journey through this life, to the moment of hurt, all the way to the end, I know you would see them. I know they would see you. They knew they would make the transgression they made against you when they signed up for that soul’s journey.

Here’s the thing, you also knew all of the transgressions you would make against other people. Transgressions aren’t about saying the wrong thing or not offering to pick up toys after a playdate. Those things do NOT matter, I assure you. Transgressions are intentional trespassings of trust and kindness against another’s soul. The kind of things that cut deep into someone’s humanity. The kinds of things you’ve done to cut someone down on purpose.

It makes sense why you don’t believe in forgiveness for those things. They seem too deep to fathom ever “forgiving” someone for. But the truth is, I know you’re afraid of forgiving yourself. And I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to like that word to get out of it what you want.

Let’s throw forgiveness out. I get it. I’m with you. The word has so many weights that society has tied to it that everything is tangled now. As if “forgiveness” is the right thing to do.

I’m here to tell you that you’re right, it’s “seeing” that feels better for you. And that’s because you’re a seer babe. So don’t forgive. Don’t expect others to forgive you. In time though, I’m here to help you see other people in a way that frees your heart from the weight of un-forgiveness without forgiving, if that’s what you want.

I know you feel like you’re in a place now that you can forgive your old friends, you know the transgressions they made aren’t the deep kind. They feel that way though, I’m with you on that. But I know you can see them. You don’t have to forgive them. Seeing them for everything they were trying to do is enough. Doesn’t mean it was the right fit for you, even though you asked for what you wanted. They’re still learning in this Earth School just like you are. 

Sometimes space from these people is what we need. I know you’re scared of space. I get that. Do you think that’s because I’m here in this space? With all the reassurances you need but you’re afraid are different than what you’re “supposed” to think so you’ll be different once again? I know you hate that. And that’s ok. Because you are different. You always have been. You seek to understand everything that sometimes isn’t understand-able. That’s why I’m here. To sit with you until we can see. Maybe not understand, but see. Definitely not forgive, but see.

“Oh I see” like Tarzan and Jane. Jane trying to teach a human from another world the language of hers. We have our own language and you can always come to me for definitions you need new words for. I’m here to be the Unconditional Love dictionary that you’ll trust more than Google. That shit never seems to hit the nail on the head like you need it to. And that means you’re right on track. Universal definitions don’t work for you. And that’s a gift. 

I know we can work through any of these kinds of things together. Keep coming back. Keep asking. I’m here.

P.S. I know a big hangup of yours is that you think to forgive = to forget. And you don’t forget anything. You’ve seen something, you keep seeing it, keep remembering it. So yet again, no need to forgive or forget. Just see, whenever you’re ready.

It’s like everyone else is using the green trash cans the world has given them and you’re throwing what you see and hear into the pink recycle bin so it can be re-spun in a way that feels right for you. Let me be that for you. REMIX!